Michelle Obama in Her Own Words Read online

  Minneapolis Star Tribune, October 14, 2008

  I separate my life so that when I am on the road, I am on the road. It’s sort of like you are Batman. When you turn that off, you put that cape away.

  Chicago Sun-Times, August 7, 2007

  I can’t do everything.

  People, November 17, 2008

  With the exception of life in the public eye, I’d say that my life now is really no different from many of yours. I say this often. I wake up every morning like most women in this room, wondering what minor miracle I have to pull off to get through my day.

  Campaign speech, July 8, 2007

  My ability to get through my day greatly depends upon the relationships that I have with women: my mother, my aunt, my girlfriends, my neighbors, the mothers in my children’s school. I have this wonderful network of women where we rely upon one another for emotional and practical support. In these women I find a place of comfort and sanity and peace like no other. We ground one another.

  Campaign speech, July 8, 2007

  The only difference between me and every other woman that I know is that my challenges are publicized, and I’m doing this juggling in front of cameras.

  Boston Globe, October 28, 2007

  We are struggling with this notion of balance. I think that is what we are all facing as women, because we are overworked and we are overscheduled and we are juggling, and we are not getting enough support. There is a part of me that feels it’s very therapeutic to be out on the road with other women and to say, Hey, you are not crazy; this is hard.

  The Intelligencer, October 27, 2007

  I think my generation of professional women are sort of waking up and realizing that we potentially may not be able to have it all, not at the same time.

  Essence, September 2007

  We all agonize about that work-family balance. We always feel like whatever we decided to do, we worry that it’s the right thing to do, whether it’s working part-time or staying at home. I think at every level women are racked with guilt and feel like they’re not doing enough. I am no exception, and I can’t say that I’ve completely resolved it.

  Chicago Defender, November 5, 2007

  If a toilet overflows, we’re the ones frantically rescheduling the 9:00 A.M. meetings so that we can meet the plumber. And we have the added social pressure of being attractive, charming, and delightful mates, well-groomed, in good spirits, ready to be supportive of our significant others. I know I can get an amen on that. I’m tired just thinking about it.

  All Things Considered, NPR, July 9, 2007

  We try to convince ourselves that somehow doing it all is a badge of honor, but for many of us it is a necessity and we have to be very careful not to lose ourselves in the process.

  Campaign speech, April 18, 2007

  Every minute after I had my first child I questioned my decisions.

  ABC News, January 24, 2008

  I’m going to get tired. My hair is going to be messy.

  Campaign speech, April 18, 2007

  When you’re growing up, you’re taught, I am woman, hear me roar, I can do whatever I want to do. I guess you can, but there are serious tradeoffs in balancing and juggling. We have to be more honest with ourselves as women, particularly young women, to prepare them for the reality that there are difficult choices they have to make. It will be hard, it will be emotionally challenging and draining. It’s not all pretty.

  Concord Monitor (NH), December 6, 2007

  People told me, “You can do it all. Just stay the course, get your education and you can raise a child, stay thin, be in shape, love your man, look good and raise healthy children.” That was a lie.

  Los Angeles Times, August 22, 2007

  My mother says all the time, she doesn’t know how [I] do it. And she means it.

  Campaign speech, April 18, 2007

  ON BARACK AS A FATHER

  Barack has been on the road since our kids were born, and we treat that as a normal thing. They understand his schedule. Therefore, they thrive because we’re happy about it. And if Mom is president, that’s cool, as long as Dad or someone is going to their baseball games, is listening to their stories and their issues. There’s got to be someone in a kid’s life who makes them feel central.

  Ladies’ Home Journal, August 2008

  Harry Potter is huge in our house. He handles all of that. Barack is the Harry Potter parent.

  Associated Press (AP), July 18, 2007

  It’s a tough choice between, Do you stay for Malia’s basketball game on Sunday or do you go to New Jersey and campaign for Corzine? Corzine got it this time around, but it’s a constant pull to say, Hey, guys, you have a family here.

  Chicago Tribune, December 25, 2005

  Every day, his great desire is to be a better father. It touches me when our girls touch him. Whether it’s with a story or a word. You can see it in his face. That’s the leader I want: Somebody who is so moved by their own children, that they’ll go out there and fight for everyone else’s.

  Ladies’ Home Journal, August 2008

  ON BARACK AS A ROCK STAR

  He’s had some attention in his life, and it’s never gone to his head because we were raised with really pretty basic Midwestern values. It’s who you are as a person and how you treat others that matters, not the degree you hold or the position you hold. All of this is very flattering, but he will not get a big head.

  Arlington Heights Daily Herald (IL), July 27, 2004

  What is interesting to me is when one of these stars is actually excited to see Barack. It’s like, you’re kidding, right? They are nervous, too And I’m like, but you’re Queen Latifah. Or Barbara Walters, coming up to me saying, I just want to introduce myself to you. I’m like, I know who you are.

  Chicago Tribune, December 25, 2005

  I’m kind of thrown by the reaction we’re getting all over the country. Sometimes I wonder, you’re all here for this guy? Barack Obama?

  Concord Monitor (NH), May 5, 2007

  Barack is not our savior. There are many of us who want to lay all of our wishes, fears and hopes at the feet of this young man, but life doesn’t work that way and certainly politics doesn’t work that way. You’ve got to be with him no matter what.

  University Wire (UWire), October 26, 2004

  ON BARACK’S CHOICE OF JOE BIDEN AS VICE PRESIDENT

  People ask, did I play a role? Absolutely not. I always tell him, this is your choice. You will be the President of the United States and you’ve got to have somebody that you can trust, that you think will have your back, who believes in you.

  Gayle King Show, August 25, 2008

  One thing a nominee earns is the right to pick the vice president that they think will best reflect their vision of the country, and I am just glad I will have nothing to do with it.

  The View, June 18, 2008

  ON BARACK’S CIGARETTE HABIT

  To me it’s a role model thing. You can smoke or you can be president.

  Chicago Tribune, April 22, 2007

  ON BARACK’S COLLEAGUES

  You want people you can hang out with, that you trust, that you sit down and have a good conversation with, in addition to the advice, guidance and wisdom he brings. I think about it as a wife who’s got to hang out with this crew, right?

  People, September 8, 2008

  ON BARACK’S HOUSEHOLD CHORES

  When he comes home, he’s taking out the garbage and he’s doing the laundry and he’s making up the beds, because the girls need to see him doing that, and he knows I need him to do that.

  Vanity Fair, December 2007

  When Barack’s home he’s going to be part of this life. He doesn’t come home as the grand poobah.

  Wall Street Journal, February 11, 2008

  It matters less to me that Barack’s the one helping with babysitting and giving me the time for myself; it’s that I’m getting time.

  People, June 18, 2007

  ON BARACK’S SAFETY


  Barack has Secret Service protection, and that in and of itself provides a level of security that didn’t exist in our everyday lives. So I think that the question of security has been a bit overblown. We didn’t make the decision to enter this worrying about safety. When you look at people who came before us, people like Martin Luther King Jr., there was a real reason to be afraid. We’re living in different times. As far as I’m concerned, whatever we are sacrificing is nothing compared to what others have sacrificed.

  U.S. News & World Report, February 1, 2008

  I tell people something bad could happen, and I think about that. How could you not? But something great could happen as well.

  Newsweek, January 28, 2008

  We talk a lot as a family, and we keep our girls very much a part of the discussion when it comes to campaign planning. They’re very comfortable with the Secret Service [assigned to our house]. They call them the Secret People.

  Glamour, September 2007

  We are grateful the Secret Service is a part of it. I’m probably more grateful than Barack, who loves to live a very normal life. This is the first sign that our lives aren’t normal.

  Newsweek, February 25, 2008

  ON BARACK’S SHORTCOMINGS

  The Barack Obama who lives in my house is not as impressive. He still has trouble putting his socks actually in the dirty clothes [hamper], and he still doesn’t do a better job than Sasha at making his bed, so you’ll have to forgive me if I’m a little stunned at this whole Barack Obama thing.

  Associated Press (AP), May 29, 2007

  [He] can’t handle goody bags. Let me explain the goody bag thing. You have to go into the party store and choose the bags. Then you have to choose what to put in the bags, and what is in the boys’ bags has to be different from what is in the girls’ bags. You’d walk in there and wander around the aisles for an hour, and then your head would explode.

  Michelle as quoted in Barack Obama, The Audacity of Hope

  I’m a better dancer than he is.

  Ellen Degeneres Show, September 8, 2008

  ON BEING A MOTHER

  At times it can be wearing, because you’re on 24/7. Part of what we’ve had to figure out is what kind of support do I need to make my life less hectic? I’d like the support to come from Dad, but when it can’t, I just really need the support. It doesn’t really matter whether it’s him or not as long as our kids are happy and they feel like they are connected to him. So I have to get over the fact that it’s not him. It’s Mom, friends, babysitters.

  Chicago Tribune, December 25, 2005

  My support for my husband comes straight from my motherhood bones.

  ABC News, January 24, 2008

  The days I stay home with my kids without going out, I start to get ill. My head starts to ache. I like to talk about it, because I think every couple struggles with these issues. People don’t tell you how much kids change things. I think a lot of people give up on themselves. They get broken, but if we can talk about it, we can help each other.

  The Telegraph (UK), July 26, 2008

  The girls get into our bed and I turn on the lights so we’re sort of waking up. And we talk. We talk about Daddy being President, about adolescence, about the questions they have.

  People, August 4, 2008

  The first priority is to make sure that my kids have their heads on straight. They are great and they are stable and they are confident, and I want to make sure that they stay that way.

  Chicago Sun-Times, August 7, 2007

  ON BEING COMPARED TO JACKIE ONASSIS

  I’m flattered, not just because she was a style icon, but because she managed to raise some pretty sane and terrific kids in the midst of a lot of drama and difficulty.

  Ebony, September 2008

  Camelot to me doesn’t work. It was a fairy tale that turned out not to be completely true because no one can live up to that. And I don’t want to live like that.

  USA Today, May 11, 2007

  I had the honor to meet Caroline Kennedy. And to see her as such a decent, normal, healthy, whole and stable individual just makes me think even more of her mother for having been able to set the kind of tone in their life that has led them to be such fine adults. That’s all I could ever hope for. That would be the greatest goal that I could ever live out, raising two beautiful decent human beings in my daughters.

  Ebony, September 2008

  ON HER CAREER PATH

  Barack and I had both struggled with the question: When you know you’ve been blessed and know you have a set of gifts, how do you maximize those gifts so you’re impacting the greatest number of people? And what do you do? Is it community organizing? Is it politics? Is it as a parent? Our answer at some level is it can be all of that.

  Washington Post, November 28, 2007

  Barack hasn’t relied deeply on me for his career path, and I haven’t relied on him at all for mine. I understand why people want to make sure that somehow I’m not using my husband’s influence to build my career, and I haven’t.

  Chicago Tribune, April 22, 2007

  I wanted to experience other fields. I thought it was too limiting to decide already that [a corporate law career] was [enough] for me.

  Daily Princetonian, December 7, 2005

  I looked out at my neighborhood and sort of had an epiphany that I had to bring my skills to bear in the place that made me. I wanted to have a career motivated by passion and not just money.

  New York Times, June 18, 2008

  I started thinking about the fact that I went to some of the best schools in the country and I have no idea what I want to do. That kind of stuff got me worked up because I thought, This isn’t education. You can make money and have a nice degree. But what are you learning about giving back to the world, and finding your passion and letting that guide you, as opposed to the school you got into?

  Newsweek, February 25, 2008

  ON HER CHILDHOOD

  What I learned growing up is that if I’m not going to get my butt kicked every day after school, I can’t flaunt my intelligence in front of peers who are struggling with a whole range of things. So you’ve got to be smart without acting smart. [It’s like] speaking two languages.

  Chicago Sun-Times, September 19, 2004

  I say this not to be modest, but there are so many young people who could be me. There’s nothing magical about my background. I am not a super-genius. I had good parents and some good teachers and some decent breaks, and I worked hard. Every other kid I knew could have been me, but they got a bad break and didn’t recover. It’s like I tell the young people I talk to: the difference between success and failure in our society is a very slim margin. You almost have to have that perfect storm of good parents, self-esteem and good teachers.

  The Telegraph (UK), July 26, 2008

  I came into our marriage with a more traditional notion of what a family is. It was what I knew growing up—the mother at home, the father works, you have dinner around the table. I had a very stable, conventional upbringing, and that felt very safe to me.

  Vanity Fair, December 2007

  I was raised to believe I could do it all, and that was very empowering.

  New York Times, August 28, 2008

  When you have a parent with a disability [Michelle’s father had multiple sclerosis], control and structure become critical habits, just to get through the day.

  O, The Oprah Magazine, November 2007

  I heard that growing up, “You talk like a white girl.”

  Chicago Tribune, April 22, 2007

  I did exactly what leaders in my community told me to do. They said do your best in school, work hard, study, get into the best schools you can get into, and when you do that, baby, you bring that education back and you work in your communities.

  Chicago Sun-Times, August 5, 2007

  The life I had growing up seems so much more simple.

  New Yorker, March 10, 2008

  There’s something that happens to you when you grow
up regular.

  Campaign speech, Akron, Ohio, October 24, 2008

  The truth is, I’m not supposed to be standing here. I’m a statistical oddity. Black girl, brought up on the South Side of Chicago. Was I supposed to go to Princeton? No. They said maybe Harvard Law was too much for me to reach for. But I went, I did fine.